(And it’s too damn pretty for a man who doesn’t want to die with two more minutes to go)
This game on Friday is about as big as they get. Not only did the NFL decide to feature this rivalry on a Friday afternoon before Christmas, but they also have these two teams fighting over the division!
I'm so pumped I feel like vomiting, running out in this subzero weather in the nude, or ripping out my jugular and writing my name in whatever snow we have. Jus kidding, I'm actually waiting for my wedding day to rip out my jugular.
The historic record between these two teams is currently 43-42-1 with the Packers taking the edge from a couple weeks ago in that awful game that went down to the last possession
This whole week has been considered ‘Packer week’ here in the Twin Cities instead of the normal ‘final stretch’ of the Christmas holiday. This whole week is filled with the traditional letters from my Packer loving relatives to my Dad getting phone calls from his buddies to me cocking off to any Packer fan I know.
Even to complete strangers, it’s hard not to talk about this game coming up on Friday. This woman that stops in at work to Scotchguard the carpets is from Wisco and we were just talking smack to each other.
Traditionally, I’ll just slip on my purple sweatshirt that depicts this Viking dude urinating on the state of Wisconsin instead of my normal Vikings jersey.
What is interesting is that stat that someone told me.
‘Domestic abuse rises 40% in Wisconsin after a Packer loss.’ Can you imagine the entire whoopin going on during Christmas Eve day if the Packers end up losing? Seriously though, no matter who wins, there will end up being a bunch of Christmases ruined because their team lost.
Which is completely hilarious! Drunken uncle Jimmy will be drinking his ass off because the Pack/Vikings lost and he’s going to take it out on his whole family.
This will be the worst Christmas ever for some families.
But the fact remains that I still think the Vikings have a horrible defense and play calling to bout. I still think Mike Tice is a colossal idiot and even if the Vikings make the playoffs, It would be hard for me to imagine that they could beat any team even if they are playing at home. We just gave up 360 yards to a sick Joey Harrington! We lost to the Seahawks at home! We have four talented runningbacks who we can never seem to give 20 carries to.
It would be almost better if you could put those four names in a hat and whatever name you draw, that’s the fuckin runningback!
The Packers aren’t that much better either. They’re the ones who lost to a Florida team in Lambeau! Not to mention: Chicago, Tennessee, and the Giants! This is almost a stuperbowl of sorts because both of these teams are just lucky to be playing in the NFC. The NFC is a lot like the Eastern Conference in basketball, not that I have watched any of that lately.
Regardless, this is the first huge game since… 41-0 in the Meadowlands? I honestly can’t remember the last huge game the Vikings have been a part of. And that Cardinals game last year doesn’t count.