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Monday, March 07, 2005

Down With "The Wave"

In the lonely night,
In the stardust of a pale moonlight,
I think of you in black and white
When we were made of dreams.

I hate oil changes.

I’d rather go to the dentist three times in a row than to take my car for an oil change.
Reason being is that I don’t know much about cars—I’m getting better, but I still don’t trust some of those damn outfits.

So I run over to the nearest, spineless outfit that offers the best deal and hand them the keys to my car.

So I sit with some woman and her kid and they’re watching “The Wedding Planner”, So I’m stuck watching that crap while these phuckos dig around in my car. Luckily I had the paper in front of me so I just perused that.

After a half hour they were done with my car and everyone was cheerful about everything. I’m now starting to exhale; my blood pressure is starting to drop, and I’m starting feel like Andy Dufresne when he’s in the sewer.

I was talking with the guys about cars in general and it looked like I was going to get out of there without anything wrong. Great.

I got the bill, signed it, and was about to step out. That’s when I hear,

“Oh but it looks like you have a bad lower intake gasket. Hold on”
“Ah damn it! How much is it going to cost?” I replied.

The guy didn’t know right away and he had to go through a series of programs to find out. Another dude is right behind him and is saying on how it will cost between $800 and $1200 depending on what the circumstances are.

I pretended I didn’t hear that last comment and waited for the computer to confirm.

“Ah, yep, just what I thought. What did I say it was going to cost?”
“Comes out to $803. You were dead on.” Replied the computer guy.

This is when I reached for my gun.

Then I realized I never had a gun, so I started a tirade followed with some manly crying. I left the place dazed and dumbfounded.
How the hell could a vehicle with 17,000 miles have a bad gasket?
How the hell does a gasket cost $800 with labor?

I haven’t had the work done yet because everyone who I ask seems to think they were just hosing me. I’m thinking that too because…what the hell else am I supposed to think?

Crap List

1. Shady repair outfits
Again, it’s like going to the dentist. You trust the dentist to tell you what they see on your teeth, what you may need to work on, and techniques for proper tooth care. You don’t expect them to give you some bullshit about having eleventeen cavities. Even if that was the case, you’d think they’d show you what’s wrong.

These bastards never even showed me the “leaky lower intake gasket” WTF??

2. The Moorhead HS fans
Hog and I attended the Minnesota AA high school hockey championship based off of tickets that I won through work. Traditionally, this has been one of the hottest tickets around because of the history surrounding the tournament and the schools involved. Not to mention that numerous tournament alums will value a state tournament championship over any NCAA championship they earned.
Minnesota high school hockey is like holy hockey. I will talk about this more tomorrow because Hog and I were amongst celebrity…well kinda.

This year Holy Angels Academy and Moorhead HS were playing for the high school hockey championship.

Anyway, during the second period, the score was 3-4 and this is when Moorhead started the most despicable of all things.

Let me reiterate, this is the dream of so many kids, parents, and relatives. This is one of the most competitive tournaments of amateur hockey around.
Despite all this, the Moorhead fans decided to start “the wave”.

I hate the wave with a passion. It tells me that the fans don’t care about the game and they would rather participate in an arena wide celebration of throwing up your arms instead of watching the highly competitive game.

If I were hockey emperor, this shit wouldn’t fly at all. These people would be kicked out on the spot—and not in a nice way either. These people would be thrown out and banned for a year because…
YOU DON’T PERFORM THE WAVE AT A HIGH SCHOOL HOCKEY CHAMPIONSHIP GAME THAT IS DECIDED BY ONE GOAL.

That is just wrong.

The Saints have the right idea by banning the wave. They have signs posted at the grandstand that explicitly nixes the wave. You wont see anyone performing the wave at a Saints game because it’s fucking stupid.

However, there is a time and place for the wave—I will admit.
I have outlined that, in baseball, if a game is at or beyond the 6th inning and if the game is a blowout of five or more runs--AND nothing is happening; then yes, yes the wave is appropriate.
I was at a Twins/Brewers game when the Twins were up by six runs in the 6th. The game was going nowhere and it seemed appropriate. The wave was being generated and I, despite my hatred for the wave, participated because it followed my personal guidelines for proper “wave timing”

On the flipside though, in 2000 I was at a game in the dome against the Indians. This was the game that started the Twins 2nd half collapse of 2000. The Indians were still very competitive that year as well.
Anyway, it was the top of the ninth, tied 2-2, and runners were on for the Indians. This is where baseball is at it’s best with the managerial strategy involved and the intense managing of the bullpen.

Then out in the 1st base stands, the damn wave is starting. Not only that, but everyone’s following through with it.
I have never been more embarrassed to be a Twins fan.

3. Work
I swear I work under some really dumb people. Construction overtime has been cancelled for a couple weeks causing numerous crucial jobs to be put on hold. After talks, the new idea is that overtime should be used only a couple weekends a month.
Fine right?
Well, overtime is a necessity because it’s the work that is performed at off hours. If a job is going to take 20 hours of OT, there’s no getting around it.
So now if you bunch all the OT in a two-weekend period, it leaves the greater chance of working on Sundays or, what we call, 2OT, which will end up costing more.

This whole fiasco started because the construction/maintenance budget has been exhausted because it’s been a busy year in that work.

Lets face it a construction budget is nothing but wishful thinking. You never know what will go wrong and at what time. So if you go over the budget, everything is falling apart.

It’s just **bangs his head** so-stupid!!!


Anyway, tomorrow I’ll have more on the hockey tournament.

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