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Wednesday, March 09, 2005

It's WhoooorrrrrRIFIC!!!!!

And number 2
You have the right to food money
Providing of course you
Don’t mind a little
Investigation, humiliation

-Where the hell is everyone? I’m getting like ten damn people a day. I used to get eleven!

Oh everyone’s probably hanging out at the beach in Missouri or bowhunting in Oklahoma.
Hell, they’re all probably gambling at Vegas. So maybe I should go to Vegas.
Yeah, next week I’m going to Vegas.

-I usually group the genre of War movies in with Sci Fi movies because I usually can’t stand them. Even if I were held at gunpoint, I still couldn’t give a proper plot description of Star Wars.

Uh okay there’s these two guys and they’re brothers and they gotta..uh destroy
some planet from marrying... their sister who has cinnamon rolls in her hair and
then—You know what, just pull the trigger.

I mean all war movies have the weird characters, the separation of family, someone get’s wounded and tears start flowing, and the brotherhood thing going on.

Maybe it’s because I generally don’t like war movies. Maybe it’s my opinion that war movies begin and end with the movie Glory. This, THIS is a war movie! Starring Denzel Washington, Morgan Freeman, and Ferris Bueller!

It can’t get much more gooder than that.

-This last weekend I was in a crazy movie mood. I have this “on demand” thing by Comcast so I have a bunch of movies all of a sudden. Friday night I was in the mood for Glory because I haven’t seen that movie in a long time. Saturday night I saw Mississippi Burning because, again, I haven’t seen that movie in a long time.

After seeing both movies I have determined that the best antagonist in any movie/play has to be “the south”. I have always been one to frown to the likes of NASCAR, “GITRDUN”, and any redneck crap because it’s just plain stupid. Not to mention that the “bible belt” is the south and I’ve had a recent “falling out” with religion as of late.

During the last part in Glory I was totally rooting on the Bueller’s regiment. I was even thinking that they were going to take-over that fort at the end.

It was wishful thinking and I turned off that movie with a God-I-hate-Confederates attitude.

It was at this point that I felt like buying a Union uniform and taking a walk around the block.

At the end of Mississippi Burning I felt a similar attitude except that it was focused towards small towns in Mississippi. I even felt that, in order to compensate, I should start hating white people.

I guess I can’t “hate” in the sense, but I really dislike some prominent white people already like Carl Pohlad, Red McCombs, Bud Selig, George Bush, Ben Stiller, former lead singer of Creed, and my old boss at the yacht club.

They’re all white and I can’t stand all/any of them.
So it’s set, I’m racist against white people.

-The other night I came home and turned on “Storm Chasers” which is an old IMAX movie that has been converted to high definition. I plopped on the couch and watched different camera angles of hurricanes terrorizing the east coast.
My jaw was on the floor and my hot dog was turning into bratwurst.
Then came the formation of a funnel cloud from a wall cloud. At this point I was thinking about grabbing a napkin for the bratwurst was turning into a huge polish sausage.

Watching storms is like watching porn.

-Sunday I ran eight miles for the second long run of my training. During the 75 minute run I began to think,
Why am I doing this again? And I went through the reasons.
Was it…
Because I wanted to experience the joy of accomplishment? Meh, kinda but not really.
Because I want to lose some weight? Again, somewhat of the main reason by not totally.
Because it’s always been a dream to run a marathon? Sure, but this is my second marathon
Because I’m an idiot? True, but not the reason
Because I want to eat a lot and not feel guilty? Bingo
Some people have diseases like anorexia and bulimia. Not me, I run a lot just so I can eat a whole lot.

That’s not that pathetic is it?

-I noticed that the Yankee/Red Sox spring training game on Tuesday was broadcast in HD for fans in Boston. Then I noticed that the Big Ten basketball Semifinals on CBS are NOT broadcast in HD.
What the hell is up with that?

-ESPN in particular is overly pimping its own stuff. ESPN is rapidly turning into the MTV of sports with it’s damn bias over it’s own programming.

Could they be anymore whorrific?
yeah, it’s time to go to bed. Anytime you make up a word that describes the movie, Boondock Saints, it’s probably time to go.

Good day

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