Search This Blog

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

With a Vengeance

Somewhere out in the wild wild west
That silly little thing that we tossed, tossed, tossed
Somehow we don't talk about nothing else but that
Silly little thing that we lost, that we lost, that we lost

Apparently Hog’s vagina got snagged by a splinter.

He is right though, the blog has become a little stagnant as of late and it’s totally because of a couple things:

1. The job is taking up all my thoughts and imagination at this time. I’m unable to hang outside the women’s bathroom and oogle at women like I used to do. I now have to look after contractors and when I’m not doing that I have to figure out what’s happening tomorrow and if I’m done doing that it’s the next day. Then I gotta mess around with cost savings bullshit, so I really gotta be an ass to these guys always having them try to save money.

2. There’s nothing going on.
Seriously, between me, locally, nationally, and globally (developed countries that is) that is anything worth talking about. May was a great month to be a weatherman because, as it’s been proven throughout the month, that you say anything you want and still not be docked in pay. It’s been raining at some point everyday for about forty days and here I am without any idea on how to build an arc.

Me: I got nothing.

Locally: Uh… a couple boaters died over the weekend. WHOA BIG SHOCKER THERE!

Nationally: Deep Throat has been revealed, and it’s no one anyone knows of. More Iraqi deaths-surprise there!

Globally: France rejects the EU constitution--NO NOT FRANCE! France never fucks with other country’s shit.

If I could go back in time to Sept 12,13,14 2001 ect. when everyone was talking (including me) about how we’ll never reach a level of ’normalcy’ again I’d go off with,

“IT’S NOW ALMOST JUNE OF 2005 AND WE’VE REACHED NORMALCY. IT’S BORING, SO SETTLE DOWN AND WAIT FOR JUNE 2005 SO YOU CAN HAVE NOTHING TO TALK ABOUT.”

President hasn’t said anything stupid lately.
Athletes haven’t said anything ‘over the top’ stupid lately.
The biggest movie at the box office is actually a decent, justified movie (SW III)
The Vikings have even been good too!

THERE’S NOTHING TO TALK ABOUT!!!!! NOTHING!!!!!

Now to take someone out to the woodshed,

Although Hog is right on his assessment he’s still an asshole for pointing it out in the form of a comment.

I’m not above criticism of any form. Rip on me for a topic, idea, or even some of my tastes but don’t tell me my blog has gone south the last month. If I were to (blink:blink) charge money, accept donations, or even get paid for this blog that would be another story, but I sure as hell am not making money off this nor do I strive to. In fact, I never started such a blog to entertain anyone. It was merely for myself and how I really wanted to write something, anything about anything.

Bloggers are not professional writers nor do they strive to be. It’s just a realm to write about whatever it is they want to write about. To criticize Joe Schmo’s free blog is completely ridiculous in my book,

I’m sorry if I’m not writing Pulitzer prize winning entries everyday, but If you’ve had a chuckle, smirk, or even a thought from my blog you are an asshole for writing something like that. And to say that my ‘ego‘ has become so huge that I can write anything pisses me off thoroughly due to such ignorance. If I want to write about tossing a Frisbee, I’m going to fucking do it and not because ‘everything I write is comedy gold‘! My blog which is free, which I’m not writing for you, which I’m not getting paid for, which I spent time on everyday is not forcing anyone to read it.

Also it wouldn’t be so bad if you were a blogger yourself because then you could give examples or even give me some influence, but you’re not and to demand more entertainment from a free blog, from a friend no less, is an absolute asshole move!

If you don’t like it, pick another blog or website. There are hundreds of millions of sites out there.

So Hog, while you are a great, longtime friend of mine, if you can come up with something better go write your own fucking blog.

And if you’re going to play the ‘just kidding’ card, fuck you anyways.
Don’t take it personally.

Until then anyone that criticizes free public expression can sit on an upside down bar stool, watch American Idol, and spin!

by the way... I got Minnesota blog of the day again for last Thursday's Puhple pride entry.
What timing!

6 comments:

Eric Wormann said...

KICK HIS ASS, HOG!

Hog said...

NOW THAT"S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!! THAT'S THE FIRE THAT WE ALL KNOW!!

I won't play the "just kidding" card like you thought I would, my friend. I'll play the "can't take a fucking joke" card instead.

If you look at all the other comments that I have left in the past, they're all condescneding and criticizing, it's what I do. I'm a sarcastic son of a bitch. I thought you'd get that.

But whatever, I'm too lazy to be in a grudge or anything so yeah, fuck me, fuck me right in the goat ass. I'll go fuck myself or whatever you told me to do and we'll let that be that.

KC for Caps!

Anonymous said...

Until then anyone that criticizes free public expression can sit on an upside down bar stool, watch American Idol, and spin!

correct me if i'm wrong but I believe we could consider justin's criticism to be free public expression. so get yourself upside down and turn on the tube.

lycradog said...

I know your readership probably isn't all that interested - nor are you, probably, and who could blame you - but there's all kinds of interesting shit going on in Canadian politics right now. Just an FYI, in case you get really desperate for material.

tony said...

I LIKE HOTDOGS...but not so much with mustard or any of that other crap. just give me plain old hotdogs with ketchup, lots of ketchup and im a satisfied man...also ummmmm well nothin i got nothing

Eric Wormann said...

The day you post about canadian politics is the day I stop reading.