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Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Oh Hells Yeah

Smoke is in the air
From your little cigarettte
You tell me to throw the fight
Go and place your little bet

Never before have I been so excited to pay so much money.

I consider myself to be very liberal spending in terms of petty cash, conservative with denominations over $70, and ultra conservative with anything over $300. Every check and every time I have given my card for something over $300 has left me with a nauseous feeling that only Wendy’s can help stop.

That nauseous ness lasts for about a week before I can finally live with myself. Hell, even in those broke times when my folks helped me out with school I still felt sick writing that $3500 check to the school.

Well, I take that back, when I bought my TV I didn’t feel that way.

Last Wednesday, hopefully, will be the last time I will ever wear contacts again. Therefore, I am giddy as my Dad in ‘The pit’ at any NASCAR race.

Just the thought takes my breath away. All those day the contacts would irritate the eyes, the days they wouldn’t go in, all that saline solution, the 2 year law, and not having to worry about losing them-gone!
Like I mentioned earlier, I would be able to go to bed and see 20/20, wake up at 4am to grab some water (still see 20/20), and wake up the next afternoon and not have to fumble for glasses.

I could spend another birthday at Gasthaus next month, drink a couple boots, and wake up in the street and NOT have to wonder where the hell my glasses went (one less thing to worry about).

I could wake up and play football in seconds.
I could sleep without having to strategically place glasses anywhere.
I could actually see better after this surgery.
I could clearly tell that my little Chinese poster is just that and not a huge centipede.

That’s incredible! It’s like going to the State fair and having a $10 voucher for Cheese curds.

4 comments:

bigg_pappa said...

Goddamnit Tom where are you playing football at; last weekend I had four of my lazy-ass friends cancel from the oh-so-necessary post-Gophers victory pick-up 4-on-4 game, leaving the remaining four of us to...pass the ball around, get pissed off, and go home. Football is in my blood; I need it, I need to compete, put me in coach I am ready to play; I have the sweetest receiver gloves imaginable, I can catch anything under the sun! P.S. this is Teal, BTW.

Boof said...

Mr. Teal, I see you've become one on the blogging front.

Yeah I got those gloves, I got the shoes, and I'll kick your ass on the field all day long. Give me a call next time you need someone

Hannes said...

Nice, congradulations! Which type of surgery did you get? Is it Lasik or is it the other one, R..something something?

Eric Wormann said...

What the hell is a Cheese Curd? Minnesota gets weirder and weirder. Alright, back to organizing my Bon Jovi and Bruce Springsteen albums.