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Tuesday, November 29, 2005

A Football Apology

You reached for the secret too soon, you cried for the moon.
Shine on you crazy diamond.
Threatened by shadows at night, and exposed in the light.
Shine on you crazy diamond.


There is one man that can walk the streets of Minneapolis and serve crow to everyone. This man is also allowed to point and yell at everyone calling them a bunch of “assfaces for being such stupid fucking negative nancy bitches” as he may or may not call those people. His job has been scrutinized publicly for basically 2 years with continuous calls of “meathead”, “dumbass”, and “stupid god damn idiot, put that challenge flag back in your fucking pocket”.

Yes this is Mike Tice I am talking about. I have been a major opponent of him being a head coach. The teams have traditionally started strong but have continued to lose on the road, against really crappy teams, and he says really stupid things. I criticize the hell out of him when he loses.

Now that he’s winning it’s only fair that I acknowledge such a feat. Actually it’s damn right amazing that he’s found a way to win four in a row and be in the playoff hunt.

Think of it, five weeks ago our MVP quarterback tore every ligament in his leg, the franchise embarrassed every fan that owns and wears team merchandise in public, and every week the sports columnists (and local bloggers) were like ravaged dogs all fighting for a piece of bloody meat whenever the coach would show his face. Now we’re in the middle of a playoff hunt with a relatively easy schedule remaining.

Whenever I watch this team now I see something that I haven’t seen in almost a decade. Players are tackling! Players are breaking up passes on third and long! Wide out slants are now being defended against! The team actually has a defense!

With such a four game winning streak it is important to note that the team hasn’t played the best teams in the league, but they really aren’t the worst either. Lets examine.

Vs. Green Bay
The Packers always play the Vikings tough especially at the dome because --I hate to admit this--the dome is almost always filled with 40-50% packer fans.

@ New York Giants
We beat them without scoring and offensive touchdown and right after a week where they torched the Redskins and beat the Broncos.

Vs. Detroit
Well, Detroit sucks so…

@ Green Bay
It’s hard to beat the packers in Lambeau! That stupid Gado guy has rushed for a 100 yards in 2 out of the three games he’s played and both were against respectable defenses in Atlanta and Philadelphia.

During this four game streak the team has given up an average of 16 points, which is amazing for the Vikings.

And throughout his four year tenure as a head coach it should be pointed out that he had the cheapest owner in football--isn’t it great when your favorite football AND baseball team is owned by the cheapest owner in their respected sport--and that owner even held a garage sale to make a couple extra dollars.

I hope that if Tice had the financial support of the owner that the Vikings would’ve had much better assistant coaches in the past and this year when they had one guy for offensive line coach and offensive coordinator.

Despite all that it still seems likely that Tice will lose his job come January 3rd. The only way he keeps it is if the Vikings manage to make the playoffs, which still seems like an uphill battle knowing that the tie breaker is already lost against the Bucs and Falcons…and Panthers (if it should ever get that bad for them).

The Vikings were in the middle of arguably their darkest hour about a month ago and now this team has already solidified itself as the “not the worst Vikings team ever, record wise”, which is better than being the worst team ever.

So call me an assface if you will Mr. Tice because I respect you for it.

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