They had sex in Pennsylvania
A Brazilian grew a tree
And a doctor in Manhattan
Saved a dying man for free
-I forgot to bitch about this on Monday but what a damn dumbass that US snowboarder, Lindsey Jacobellis, is. She was blowing away the competition away in the snowboard cross when she decided to start Cadillacing’ it on the last jumps by holding her board and wipes out. The Swiss snowboarder 50 yards behind ended up winning the event based on Jacobellis’ showing off.
You dumb bitch! You had an easy shot at the gold and blew it. Not only that but you fed the egos of those European countries like France. Look at all those other athletes that train for years just to medal in something. Now think of losing the gold because of your own dumbassiness and settling for silver.
Aaaargh I don’ t even want to think about it.
-To the person that decided to check out season 3 of the Sopranos at the Library,
I hate you. Here I am strung out on the Sopranos, the first show I have been completely into since…Knight Rider and now I have to settle for On Demand, 3x4 aspect ratio crap which is a pain in the ass to rewind.
God damn, what a good show though.
-Do you realize how much ESPN will milk the Barry Bonds 715 deal this year? Oh my god it’s going to completely shameless and insane. It’s already started because they have one reporter completely dedicated to Bonds, recording everything he does. No doubt 715 is a historic number but…it’s Barry Bonds. It’s really strange how some of these power hitters have completely regressed in some manner ever since steroid testing was mandated.
-oh my god I can’t wait until summer. Twins baseball, baseball road trips to Milwaukee and Cleveland, Pearl Jam is going to tour (East Troy most definitely), and chillin on the balcony.
-after doing my taxes I found out that I can pay off my LASIK surgery which would mean that I am completely debt free. Not that I was ever in debt problems or anything but it’s nice knowing that all your shyt’s paid for.
-Parents get weird when they get older.
Mom: Hi Tommy, I saw you on TV. I didn’t even recognize you.
Boof: Oh really?
Mom: yeah. Well, just wanted to let you know that I saw you on TV is all.
Boof: Oh…? Cool
I know I’m not the best to talk to on the phone but damn.