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Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Baseball Bits...Mostly

The mind is grey like the city.
Packing in and overgrown.
Love is deep. Dig it out.
Standing in a hole alone.

-Hey Ron, exactly how far did that Morneau home run travel last night?

Twins are now in sole position of the AL Wild Card…with nearly two more months to go.

-Last weekend at the reunion my uncle started talking about his favorite childhood memories as all 70 of us listened. He then asked when the next reunion should happen.

“Should we do it every ten years?”
Everyone grumbled
“How bout five years?”
It seemed like everyone kinda liked the idea of 5 years except two people, the two oldest people.

My grandma (80) and her cousin (my grand cousin?)…
( rant…Is it entirely possible that there is one couple in Iowa that doesn’t have or aspires to have 13 kids? Or if they have 13 kids, everyone should then scatter around the world so I don’t have to figure out what the family name is for my grandma’s cousin or my cousin’s kid (my couskid?) good lord )

Anyway, so my grandma and my “grand cousin” were the only ones objecting to the notion of five years and suggested two years. Everyone had some uncomfortable looks at each other and tried to do the fake happy faces because they didn’t want to forsake their own aunt/mother/grand cousin/great aunt…
If they were 60 then it would be 5 years I’m sure.

There should be some sort of tournament for these family reunions. Everyone should have a seeding and it should be widdled down to like 16 people and they can get together and eat all the banana bread (sweet, sweet banana bread), and talk about the weather.

For instance my grandma would easily be the number one seed then the 16th seed would be that punk-ass cousin who is 16 and doesn't care about anything. This cousin is going through a ton and family get-togethers are not his/her thing. 2nd seed would be the newest born baby--there is not much that can beat a newborn except grandma. 15th seed would be that uncle that had the shittiest year and is ready to give up on life. Said uncle probably doesn't show up anyway. and so on...

So then everyone in the family votes and then the craziness happens.
Perhaps grandma had a bad run and pissed off too many people and that 16 year old is highly recruited to Iowa gathering the attention of all the Iowan guys.

Perhaps that baby is ugly and the uncle wins the lottery! You never know when it comes to...

-I just bought another baseball book, Historic Ballparks: A Panoramic Vision and I thought I would point out some more stadium bits from this book.

--The Palace of the Fans was one of the first ballparks to be built out of concrete and it looked really nice.

--The original plan for Yankee stadium was to be a triple decker 100,000 seat stadium. Can you believe that? This was the plans for back in the 1910’s!

--Speaking of the Yankees, as great as Joe DiMaggio was he had to deal with the crappiest dimensions in baseball. Yankee stadium, for right handed pull hitters, had a power ally that was never shorter than 395’ deep left center was measured at 500‘. Basically he had no chance of hitting a home run unless it was at the pole or opposite field.

--One thing I have noticed about these old parks is that they gave a huge advantage for left handed pull hitters like Yankee Stadium and the Baker Bowl. The Palace of the Fans in Cincinnati had a right foul pole distance of 450’ while the right field pole was…I can’t find any info on that but it was considerably shorter.
It has to be…right?

--Again if you want craziness that was on-field look to Sportsman’s park in St. Louis which had a Roller coaster, merry-go-round, lawn bowling, bicycle races, and a whole bunch of other stuff that was IN PLAY. I’m thinking they didn’t have any fences at Sportsman’s park.

Can you imagine enjoying yourself on the merry-go-round and a baseball comes and breaks your face?

-A Twins player has officially hit 30 home runs. I never thought I would see the day.

1 comment:

Aliecat said...

Your cousin's kid would be referred to as your second cousin. As for your grandma's cousin? Well, I'm stumped on that one.