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Friday, September 22, 2006

I'm Awesome (Picks)

Odd how the darkness always makes us whisper
and with the last of the sun
you can feel the approach of the winter.


Last week I kicked colostomy ass by going 14-2 including my upset special on Monday night.

But for god sakes, let us pray that there are no more games that are entirely full of field goals. There’s been a least two games of such and they are painful.

So… my overall record after 2 weeks is 24-7 which is fantastic. Right now I’m beating Eric who has a record of 0-0, Sugar Tits 0-0 and everyone else who also have 0-0

Yeaaaaahhhhh!!!!

Carolina @ Tampa Bay
I still think Carolina is a good team and the past couple years they have been a real November, December team. Tampa has been super sucky but they’ve played Atlanta and…someone else so I don’t know about them. Does Mike Alstodt still play? If so then Tampa sucks because he’s gotta be like 35 or something.
Panthers 17 Bucs 10

Cincinnati @ Pittsburgh
One thing I can actually count on are the Bengals still being good. They are just as good as last year and Pissburgh is still tough on defense. I like the Bengals just because they gotta be pissed about last year.
Bengals 24 Steelers 17

Green Bay @ Detroit
Ugh, I’m happy I picked up Donald Driver because the Packers suck so much that they’re forced to pass the ball throughout the 2nd half of every game. Donald Driver baby, championship.
Lions 24 Packers 21

Jacksonville @ Indianapolis
This is the game I really want to see. As the media is still cleaning up all the seamen from the Eli/Peyton matchup they will easily forget this gem because of Jacksonville’s D. Jacksonville is probably that team that I will always root for because the media will hate them.
Colts 21 Jaguars 20

NY Jets @ Buffalo
I don’t have any idea about these two teams. I suppose I’ll go with Buffalo because they’re playing at home
Bills 23 Jets 17

Tennessee @ Miami
It’s so satisfying seeing Daunte suck in Miami. He chose the number 8 because it was a “rebirth” or something stupid like that and he’s still walking into sacks like he did a year ago. I do think, however he should do something against Tennessee who had Kerry Collins as a quarterback.
Dolphins 24 Titans 13

Washington @ Houston
Houston? Geez, yuck. I’m going Redskins because…I am and I don’t know anything about the Texans except that they have a stupid name.
Redskins 17 Texans 9

Baltimore @ Cleveland
I think the Ravens fish for a defense in every prison around Maryland. That way they can continue with fresh guys who are mean and pissed off. I dunno I guess that’s my way of saying that Cleveland has no chance
Ravens 23 Browns 6

NY Giants @ Seattle
Oh geez here’s where my anti Seattle bias comes into play. Basically I think that the Giants will slice through Seattle. Seattle fans will cry realizing the Shaun Alexander was just the product of an unbelievable line and a super easy division. There, I said it.
Giants 30 Seahawks 14

Philadelphia @ San Francisco
Damn you 49ers for throwing off my easy loss for you guys. Every week it was so incredibly easy just to say something really dumb and mark the L for those guys. I think they actually have a game here. I’m picking the 49ers because I want to.
49ers 24 Eagles 20

St. Louis @ Arizona
This is the game that I’m going to be paying close attention to because I got about 4 fantasy guys playing in this game…yeah that kinda sucks eh?
Cards 23 Rams 20

Denver @ New England
Denver has been a huge mystery because they’re sucking and Plummer (who I thought was going to be awesome) is leading the suckathon. I think New England wins because they’re at home.
Patriots 24 Broncos 10

Atlanta @ New Orleans
The huge Katrina cryfest is on Monday. Oh it’s going to be bad. There’s going to be the somber music and the flashbacks and any possible reason to milk the national tragedy that happened a little over a year ago. ESPN is doing the game so I can almost see a Michael Jackson-esque “we are the world” being performed on the field
Falcons dominate
Falcons 27 Saints 21

Chicago @ Minnesota
Damn, I don’t know. Chicago has played some real cream puffs the first couple weeks of the year but this game actually means something. The Vikes have actually had a knack for grinding out the 2nd half until the other team gets too bored and wastes away the game (see that stupid trick play last week). I really don’t know about this game. I pick Chicago
Bears 23 Vikes 13

Prove me wrong guys, prove me wrong.

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