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Sunday, September 09, 2007

Constructive Phone Calls Crap

Night after night, we pretend its all right
But I have grown older and
You have grown colder and
Nothing is very much fun any more.

This last week was something that was just waaay too much for me.  Too much work and not enough napping/fun time.  With that, I am proud to present you the...

Crap List

1.  Constructive Criticism
I will be the first person to say that I cannot take constructive criticism.  At all.  Even if I ask for it.

Boof:  Tell me what is wrong with this opening
Someone else:  Well the opening sentence is weak and the inclusion of sloppy joes doesn't even make sense.
Boof:  Okay...But the sloppy joes reference is in regard to the sloppy play of St. Johns and the opening is there to support the ending.
someone else:  But it's weak.
Boof: But...you're an idiot

That's when my face turns red and my blood starts boiling.  I don't know I can't handle criticism and I act the way I do but I do wish I could have the same mentality while taking criticisms as I have while being in church--I understand, I care, I want to take a nap.

I have determined that the only way I can even withstand criticism comfortably is during this scenario:
Someone gives me some an ice cream cone with a bottle of bubbles.  I have my ice cream and I'm blowing bubbles with a big smile on my face.  Then one can criticize me and I'll be put from a happy mood to a "normal mood" 

So FYI to anyone who wants to criticize me, buy me happy things to butter me up first.

2. Phone calls
Last week I picked up my phone to call someone.  I pressed the first number when my phone beeped right before I pressed the first number.  My phone read "Call connected to (number)".  I looked at the number and realized someone called me just before I started dialing numbers.  While I was on the phone someone tried calling me and they got my voicemail.  Another guy after that tried calling me and they got my voice mail. 

I finally got off the phone and someone immediately called me before I reached my voice mail.  At the same time my personal phone started ringing and this is all before I had a chance to call the original person I tried to call. 

This type of business is just enough to put me in a terrible mood.  For instance the way I answer the phone is very different between phone calls.

Call 1:  Hello this is Tom
2:  Hello, Tom here
3:  Hello?
4:  Hello
5:  *sigh* Hello
6:  *sigh* yeah?

and at that point Penelope Cruz could be calling me and I just wouldn't care.  I just hate having all those phone calls at one time.  I think I have a 6 phone call per hour limit.  Anything more and my fuse is lit. 

Therefore, don't call me when everyone else calls.

1 comment:

The Steph said...

Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed!!