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Thursday, April 03, 2008

Butter Field?

I Got Stripes --- Stripes Around My Shoulders
I Got Chains --- Chains Around My Feet

-In the self decidedly un-nerdy Twins blogging community someone at Stick and ball nation came up with some leads for the name of the new field. It seems as if Land O' Lakes field could be in the running for the sponsorship of the new ballpark. We've all (actually just me in a padded room) discussed General Mills Field, Wheaties field (best of the blocky sponsor names), 3M Field (I don't think so), and Target field (no way). Land O' Lakes was always a suggestion that I immediately dismissed because I never really thought they'd sponsor it. At first Land O' Lakes field sounded kinda stupid but the more I thought about it.... it isn't too bad.

Let's break it down.

Whenever I hear "Land O' Lakes" I think of butter since my mom always bought the LOL butter and I'd stare and wonder about the female Indian on the cover. LOL field makes me think of butter and my mouth actually salivates when thinking about it. Since I don't put butter on anything other than corn on the cob I also think of eating blissfully, an ear of corn on the cob dripping with butter on a warm, sunny day. Butter + Corn = good times

I don't think that's a bad thing. It's better than Best Buy Park where I'd just feel guilty for spending all that damn money on the extended warrantee on a pack of batteries. I suppose General Mills makes me think of cereal but General Mills makes me think of 'IRS Burger' on the Simpson's and it sounds too industrial.

It's way to soon to assume It'll be LOL field but I'm giving my thumbs up. I want to think about butter and corn all the time. Also don't you think sweet corn would make for a fantastic baseball snack? It already makes people orgasm at the State Fair and can't be that hard to make. Dip that shit in LOL butter and there ya go. Maybe make little Twins corn holders or something. Maybe TC in a corn holder! HEY!

-I keep having weekly dreams where I have hair. They're actually very vivid and I'll wake up thinking 'oh now since I have hair, I'll grow a mohawk.' but then I look in the mirror and my Mr. T dreams have washed away. Actually I can't wait to show off my shiny cue ball in the summertime.

-I played that Slayer song on Guitar Hero III on medium and it's so horrible. There's nothing like crying like a little bitch and hearing that plucky guitar error sound at the same time.

-Wild are NORTHWEST DIVISION CHAMPIONS!!!!! Man, it's about time we get a winning club around here.

-Twins on the other hand, yuck. I'm not giving up on them yet but damn, I'm not even watching them and they're boring.

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