Search This Blog

Monday, April 07, 2008

Wussy Crap

I walk for miles along the highway
Well that's just my way of saying I love you
I'm always walking after midnight searching for you


I would've had this Crap List set for Monday but two games of Curling took a lot out of me on Sunday night. 

I just want to point out one thing before I begin.  One time I picked the final four to a T.  This year I correctly picked the championship game!  Not that it was tough picking two number one seeded teams but whatever.  If Kansas wins then I nominate myself as King Shit almighty.


Crap List

1.  Politicians who are physically uncoordinated.

I'm getting really tired of politicians delivering the first pitch of a baseball game and end up throwing worse than my mom.  I understand old, decrepit men not being able to throw a ball but sometimes these guys are in their 40's.  They'll pretend to wind up (like they think they need to), throw their weight back, and throw as if they were born without an elbow.  Where is that humongous can of Milwaukee's Best Light when you need it? 

Then in other sports you have grown men who pretend to hunt, pretend to be catching a football, and our latest example attempting to bowl.  Not that I would ever take bowling seriously but 37?  A grown man bowing a 37!?  Ugh I don't I've it's possible for me to bowl a 37.  I even have the philosophy to throw the lightest ball down the alley as fast as possible and I still don't suck as much as 37.  Little girls at least bowl a forty!

It makes me wonder if their dad ever bought them a baseball or played catch with them at all.  Not even the 'good faith' game of catch just to shut up the kid for a week.  Speaking of catching a football, who in the hell catches a football like this?  Good fucking god.  No wonder he didn't get elected. 

Also, I know he's not a politician but I was looking all over for Bud Selig throwing a first pitch at some game.  He is the commissioner of baseball and...he hit the ground about 30 feet in front of homeplate.  The ball just barely rolled to homeplate.

No comments: