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Monday, June 09, 2008

LA Trip Part 1: Brass Tax

See how they run like pigs from a gun
see how they fly
I'm crying


This last weekend I had my "job interview" in Los Angeles.  The company that wants to hire me is a company I've been working in cooperation with for the past 6 years or so where I'm at now.  They seem like a nice company to work for and I don't have any problems with them. If I did then I probably wouldn't work with them.  The main representative from this company (S) is a salesman who decided to offer me a job.

S:  Would you be interested in working for someone else?
Boof:  Sure, why not.
S:  Well would you be interested in working for me?
Boof:  I don't know.  Where would I work, what would I do, how much would I get paid?
S:  Well, if I flew you down to LA and showed you the place then would that help you make a decision?
Boof:  Sure, if you pay for everything I'll check you guys out.

I figured that since I like airports and I would be getting a free trip out of this then why would I turn it down? 

S gave me a good indication on what this job was going to entail and some basic guidelines of the job.  From this brief description and what I know about Los Angeles I determined that I was not going to take this job.  I didn't tell S this but I just wanted the free trip and would milk this for as much as I can.  After all, maybe I could get some more stuff out of this?

As it turns out S let me have the couple days and the entire weekend to check out LA so "I could get a better idea of LA" if I decided to move there.  As far as I was concerned this was nothing more than the type of spiel where you have to sit and listen to a presentation of timeshares and then an hour later you get free tickets to Universal Studios.  I just have to listen to the spiel and then I would take a rental car and watch some glorious baseball.  I kept thinking to myself, 'Now if I could only get a company in Boston to be interested in me then I could check out Fenway!' because if someone flew me out to their city for a custodial job then I would totally act interested if it meant them flying me out and paying for my room.  Why the hell would I not exercise that option?

Day one was going to be in Laguna Nuguel or "Laguna Beach" as everyone knows it as.  S and I had dinner at some sort of beautiful joint off of the beach and it certainly seemed like he was "selling" the area to me.  He seemed to have his car salesmen face on and I was just acting the part of a curious potential employer.

S:  Would you mind if my step-daughter joins us in a couple minutes?
Boof:  nah, that's fine with me.

So I was thinking to myself, 'I would bet ten thousand dollars that his step-daughter is hotter than hell.'

S:  Oh here she is, HI B, OVER HERE.

B was about 5'9 shoulder length blond hair, beautiful facial features, slender, wearing those tight jeans that showed off her amazing ass.  I was ready to award myself ten thousand dollars. 

B was there as 'someone who came to LA from the Twin Cities' and she was going to tell me how much of a transition it was for her.  She's also a saleswoman from the same company her step-dad, S, works at.  Even though I wasn't interested in the job I was trying like mad not to oogle the hell out of her and I even secretly questioned if she was really a step daughter of S.  It wouldn't be completely out of the question for S to find some hottie in LA to pose as his step daughter/saleswoman of his company to lure me into this gig. 

After all, it's not hard to find an attractive female in LA.  I think being ugly is illegal in Los Angeles.  In fact, I would say that any woman between the ages of 18-35 would be bangable.  I would probably take the odds in banging any random 18-35 year old in LA--like you could put all those names in a hat and I would bang the name that is drawn.  That's how hot everyone is. 

B told me about how the transition was to her.  Of course she was 100% positive about the experience telling me it was "the best thing she's done" and "my friends now are so much better" which made me frown.  I asked her about her commute and she responded with,

B:  It's only about 40 minutes which is great.

I nearly fell out of my chair.  80 minutes a day when gas prices are about $4.50/gal! 

So I was talking it up with S and hottie B for awhile when we finally got up to leave.  The NBA finals was about to start soon and S wanted to watch.  So B left first when me and S decided that we were going in the wrong direction to leave the restaurant.  We followed about 40 feet behind B and I was mesmerized with that ass slowly moving right-side up, left side-up, right side up as she casually started chatting away on her phone.  She moved in slow motion as I was studying the fine aspects of her ass.  I then felt a tug to my shoulder,

S:  Hey-hey, We're going this way Tom.  We parked over here. 

Haha, whoops.  Yeah, if she really is in fact a step daughter who works for the company then I'm going to get in serious oogling trouble or worse, get too flirtatious. 

S then dropped me off at the hotel at about 5:30 and I had the rest of the night to myself in Laguna Beach.  I checked out my sweet room.

DSC01570 Everywhere in my room had this type of fluffy towel work.  Even the toilet paper had this crazy fold on there which I found kinda funny.  My room even had a cool whirlpool deal along with a wide screen tv which could be angled toward the whirlpool.  It was the sweetest free hotel room I've ever been in.

After all my playing I ventured out to Laguna Beach to see the sights and the sounds...and to get my oogling grove on. 

DSC01562 As you can see, it was awesome weather.  This is off a portion of Laguna Beach.

DSC01566 This how much gas costs in Laguna Beach.  This was also before the huge increase (gas in the Twin Cities is now over $4 a gallon, this was before that).  The flowers almost make it tolerable right?  Oh Diesel was about $5.10/gal.


The trees in So. Cal were really cool in how different they were.  I don't know what kind of trees they are but I like them. 

Day 2

For Friday I had to wake up early so that S could pick me up and we'd head over to the shop to check out what the working environment was all about and talk to some of the workers.  The workers were nice and everyone at the place seemed cool.  S seemed to act like some sort of bumbling, laughing fool as we were there.  He was talking to a couple of the dock workers and they had a look on their face like, "You've never talked to me before, why are you doing this now?  Who is that bald guy?".

After a couple hours of having to listen to their spiel I was nearly on the verge of falling asleep.  I simply just wanted to go back to the hotel so I could take a nap, forget about this job nonsense, and watch some baseball.  Sure enough, we got out of there at 11:30am.  I spent a total of about 2 hours at the warehouse!  On the ride back to my hotel he started talking about brass tax in terms of the job.  The job would have the same vacation that I have now, same health and dental, it would be on days (of course) but with travel (uh oh), and I would be paid about $5000 more than what I get now for salaried time. 

I nearly chuckled because the cost of living in LA compared to the Twin Cities is noticeably different.  Gas is a dollar higher, food is also noticeably higher, and it seems to take at least 35 minutes to go anywhere in LA.  Also $5000 of salaried pay is not even close enough to pry me away from the Twin Cities.  Also, I remember B and S telling me how the weather is beautiful all year 'round which is not a selling point for me.  I actually enjoy 4 distinct seasons. 

I turned down the job outright which I could've done on Thursday but I wanted to milk a trip out of it.  It was a nice trip in that I was actually looking for a plane ticket to San Diego not to long ago and now I had a discounted trip.

Some quick bits about LA:
-The freeways are always packed but everyone merges flawlessly without much of any anger.  The zipper method was a thing of beauty and although the freeways were packed, they seemed to move at a decent pace.  I guess there wouldn't be room for any bad drivers because the aggressive ones would simply run them off.
-Flying over LA and the Twin Cities it became perfectly clear that LA doesn't have the tree cover that the Twin Cities have.  The suburbs of LA are clearly seen and you can see every house on the block.  In the Twin Cities it's a bit tough to make out a city block because there is so much green over the houses and buildings.
- The time difference is really weird. I kept getting really tired at 9pm and it was hard to fathom a baseball game being played at 4pm on a weekday.  All the baseball games I attended were the last games of the day. 

Tomorrow I will have my pictorial of Dodger Stadium and Wednesday Petco Park in San Diego.

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