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Sunday, June 29, 2008

Perceived Weather Crap

Oh my sparrow it's too late
Your body limp beneath my feet


Crap List

1. People's perception of bad weather

I was reading up on the NBA draft this year because I didn't happen to have a gun or a noose handy and I stopped on a couple mock drafts.  Most analysts were predicting the Wolves to end up with O.J. Mayo with the third pick which is a great pick.  The con in the scenario was that he might move out of town once his contract is up because of the awful weather.  I read that in multiple mock drafts and articles.  I even started hearing that on the radio and how Minnesota will be unable to attract big name free agents simply because of the "awful weather".

I was a bit puzzled because 1) basketball is played indoors and 2) these players make so much that they could easily fly down to Miami whenever they want.  Also I started wondering because we've really have only had one questionable "Minnesota winter" in the last 5 years. 

I also make it a point to listen to the Twins on the radio.  I just love picturing the game in my head and I also don't have a TV at work so it's what I'm reduced to.  I also make it a point to listen to the Twins opponent radio station because I like the different frame of reference and the Twins announcers suck ass.  Nearly every announcing crew has made a comment on how outdoor baseball in Minnesota is crazy despite the fact that it was outside for twenty years before the dome.  

Before I go on about actual Minnesota weather I want to examine what outsiders might think of Minnesota in terms of weather.  After all, it's important to know that sports fans rarely ever see anything outdoors here on TV other than the few golf tournaments we host.  The Twins, Gophers, and Vikings all play indoors.  The other sports are naturally indoors anyway so I'm wondering with all these outdoor sports being played indoors, people must think we have rain, snow, sleet, wind, blood, hell on earth-type of weather every hour, on the hour, all year long. 

Here's what I think people picture Minnesota in general

-A vast baron wasteland where people live in igloos and fish on top of iced over lakes for their daily ration of food.  People don't really talk other than reciting their Norweigian small talk.  It could be July 25 and this image of igloos and ice still fall into place.  The Mississippi separates the network of igloos on the east from the igloos on the west otherwise known as the Twin Cities.  The Mississippi also has giant ice bergs with polar bears and penguins floating down the river as the wind whistles over the land.

Basically I think the world south of Minnesota views Minnesota as the arctic circle and that it may get up to 35 degrees in the summertime.  I bet some people actually get scared thinking about what it would be like living in Minnesota. 

I asked my roommate who grew up in Boston and she pretty much agreed with my Arctic circle reference.  She even said that this last winter was unbearable to her. 

I replied by rubbing my two fingers together like a small violinist and called her a ginourmous wussy.  I think that's what it comes down to:  how much a person can take.  Here in Minnesota we've all went through that crazy patch in the mid 90's when we did experience a 70 below wind chill for those couple days.  We can walk outside in 30 degree weather and it's actually warm out sometimes.  We do go through very humid weather and spring seasons which don't really start until May. 

I think everyone else is just way too used to San Diego-like weather where its 80's and sunny and nothing ever changes.  That, to me sounds nice but where is the change?  Where's the perspective?  What would I do without spring, fall, or winter?

I remember traveling to Houston during New Years and joggers, joggers were in tights and long sleeve T's in 60 degree weather while I was walking around in shorts and a T-shirt.  I even ran the Get-in-Gear 10k in shorts while it was about 32 degrees and if I was to wear sweats, it would've been too hot. 

Here's my point,  bad weather for the rest of the country is simply a rainy day.  Bad weather in Minnesota is 30mph winds, snow, temperatures 15 degrees below or above the normal high and all that along with normal, average Minnesota drivers on the road. 

I remember walking around in April when it was 30 degrees, clear sky, and not a breath of wind.  Most people would say it's too cold for baseball but those people are wussies who should probably not live in Minnesota.

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