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Tuesday, May 12, 2009

God, I Hate that Song

Working hard to get my fill
Everybody wants a thrill
Paying anything to roll the dice
Just one more time

And what does that verse have do with the song anyway?


I was wondering what I should write about today when a song came on the radio. 

Just a small town girl...

And I immediately began to cringe.  I instantly thought of all the squealing girls turning up their radio and all the guys, alone in their cars who will start to mum the words.  Then the humming turns into rhythimic bobbing of the head followed by the fist pumping.  Finally there's the vision of Tony Soprano sitting at the diner with his family which makes the nightmare complete. 
I don't think I could possibly hate a song so much as this one.

The obvious reason is because this song was the last memory of such a great television show.  The first five seasons of The Sopranos were amazing--bad-ass Italian mafia types with a chip on their shoulder over the pushy fucking bastards in New York.  Leather jackets, guns, and the meat market--you can't get much more badass than that and they end it with a stupid god damn Journey song.  If they would've ended the show with "Wheels in the Sky" for example then I wouldn't have a problem because "Wheels in the Sky" kicks ass and I'm not ashamed to admit that because I simply shouldn't be. 

But I shouldn't kid myself though, that last season (all of season 6, both parts) was so stupid and it would've taken twice the power of Shawshank Redemption in order to fulfill any sort of satisfaction for that series.  Therefore, I'm sure my frustration in wasting my time in a season of coma watching, time wasting, loose plot line hell falls on the one song that finally ended that gigantic time waster.

Another theory is that I'm a classic rock fan.  I love Zeppelin, The Who, Creedence, Van Halen, and don't get me started on Pink Floyd.  There's a decade full of great, great music and this has to be the song that keynote spans generations.  It couldn't be American Pie or Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald, or Echoes.  I mean, I collect vinyl for the love of god and they couldn't pick Dazed and Confused?  What is the most downloaded song in the 21st century?  That's right, this stupid heart squeezing song about two strangers screwing in in some cheap hotel room after drinking their lonely fears away.  At least that's how I interpret it. 

I shouldn't hate a song so much because I believe that any music that makes one feel good is something great...except when it comes to this song.  But when I'm at the Twins game and they start the first ten seconds of "Don't Stop Believin'" and you hear the screams of what seems to be a New Kids concert then you're invading my baseball serenity.  When I'm at the bar and the song starts out and all the girls are shooshing everyone to hear and then they start belting out their best Steve Perry rendition. 

But it's only this song and not "Sweet Caroline" or "Livin on a Prayer" because I like those songs.  I will actually participate in the "bom bom bom" and the "whoooaaaaaaa we're half way there". 

Maybe it's because the popularity of the song, to me, signifies how I try to be different then the DSB (Don't Stop Believin) lovers.  Maybe it's because I think it's just a stupid fucking song and I wish that Clint Eastwood would point a gun at everyone listening to the song and say,
"Turn that shit off you stupid corporate trashbag"

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Cinco De May

Threatened by shadows at night, and exposed in the light.
Shine on you crazy diamond.

Baaah I gotta stop playing that stupid addictinggames.com golf game and start blogging.  It's tough because I don't have a set time to blog and if I don't make a point to sit down and write I never will. 

Anyways I was going to give my 2009 mlb season preview but we're already a month into the season so... I predict the Twins will win it all!  Seriously though, I like the Royals (as does everyone else) and I hate the Yankees, Mets, Red Sox, Dodgers, White Sox, Indians, and Rays.  If anyone else wins it all, I'm happy.

Otherwise it's barely even May and I'm already burnt out on wedding stuff.  My roommates are set to get married later this month and the planning has been a daily thing.  Even if I'm in the other room munching on jojos and watching Braveheart, I still hear a little wedding planning stuff in the next room.  I swear, with some women, it's like a disease and they just cannot stop watching wedding shows, chick flicky movies, and opening some lame wedding magazine.  One thing I cannot understand is that people save their wedding magazines.  What the hell?  At least I get to hand out yamicas at the wedding.

Then I have recently been ordained. 
I'll just let you absorb that last sentence while I go and grab a hamburger. 

(chomp, chomp)

Yeah it's true, I can now marry people which is funny because I generally hate weddings.  Now that I can marry people, I feel like making the whole process into a variety show.  Maybe if I ask Hog nicely enough, we can have stupid human tricks, Yambo, and headlines.  Of course I would need a musical side kick but whatever.  Just the chance to play Yambo would be awesome.  I mean who has ever had a bad yambo wedding experience?  I haven't heard of anyone.

Now I need to look for a bicycle.